What to Do When You're Overwhelmed & Anxious: Emotional Regulation Tools to Help
By La Lune Integrative Psychiatry Updated on April 23, 2024 — Medically Reviewed by Elita Wong, Board-certified Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner
Feeling overwhelmed and anxious is something many of us can relate to, especially in today's fast-paced world. But what if these feelings go beyond just a rough day or a stressful situation? What if they linger, making it difficult to focus, to find joy in everyday activities, or to simply feel at ease? This is where emotional regulation comes into play.
Emotional dysregulation is more than just feeling a bit frazzled. It's the struggle to regulate our emotional responses, leading to intense reactions, overwhelming negative emotions, and difficulties coping with stress. It can manifest in various ways, from frequent outbursts to feelings of numbness, and can significantly impact our daily lives.
In this blog post, we'll delve into the world of emotional regulation, exploring why some of us may struggle with it, what it looks like in adults, and most importantly, what tools and strategies we can use to manage these feelings. So, if you're someone who often feels like your emotions are running wild, read on to discover how you can regain control and find more peace in your day-to-day life.
What Does it Mean to be Emotionally Dysregulated?
Emotional dysregulation refers to the difficulty or inability to regulate emotional responses. People with emotional dysregulation may experience strong emotional reactions, overwhelming negative emotions, difficulty controlling their emotions, and difficulty coping with stress. Emotional dysregulation is not a permanent state, but rather an indication of a lack of emotional regulation tools, and a common experience for individuals with a diagnosis from the DSM-5, such as generalized anxiety disorder or ADHD.
Emotion regulation can fall under three general types: attentional control, cognitive reappraisal, and response modulation. When all systems are functioning as they should, these types of regulation help individuals concentrate, reframe their thoughts, and manage their emotional responses, respectively.
How Do You Know if You're Emotionally Dysregulated?
Signs of emotional dysregulation can include intense emotions that feel very difficult to control, mood swings, feeling overwhelmed by emotions, anxiety, depression, and self-harming behaviors. This can look very different from person to person. Some adults may become easily angered, irritable, and seem to yell a lot, while others may become closed off, seem emotionally numb, or completely isolate themselves because it may be difficult for them to be around people.
What Are the Three Types of Emotional Dysregulation?
The lack of emotional regulation tools may present in a variety of ways but generally falls into three categories.
Hyperarousal: Intense thoughts, feelings, and reactions compared to those of the average person are experienced by individuals with hyperarousal. This could appear as angry outbursts or frequent meltdowns.
Hypoarousal: When hypoarousal occurs, a person’s emotional tolerance is too little or too low, which can involve emotional numbing, social withdrawal, and a disconnect between the body and feelings. This could appear as self-isolation.
Emotional Numbness: When people are emotionally numb, they feel empty, disconnected from themselves and others, and isolated.
What Happens to the Body & Brain in Emotional Dysregulation?
Emotional dysregulation can impact the brain in various ways, particularly affecting areas responsible for emotional processing and regulation.
The limbic system, which includes the amygdala and insula, plays a crucial role in emotional reactivity. In individuals with emotional dysregulation, these regions may be overactive or hypersensitive, leading to heightened emotional responses. Additionally, disruptions in the prefrontal cortex, responsible for regulating emotions and making decisions, can contribute to difficulties in controlling emotions. These brain alterations can result in difficulties in managing stress, regulating mood, and responding appropriately to emotional stimuli.
Unmanaged overwhelm can manifest in various ways in the body, affecting both physical and mental health. Here are some common symptoms and their impacts:
1. Muscle Tension: When overwhelmed, the body may tense up, leading to muscle stiffness and discomfort. This tension can contribute to headaches, neck and back pain, and overall bodily discomfort.
2. Digestive Issues: Stress and overwhelm can affect the digestive system, leading to symptoms such as stomach pain, bloating, constipation, or diarrhea. These symptoms can be uncomfortable and impact overall well-being.
3. Sleep Disturbances: Anxious thoughts can disrupt sleep patterns, leading to difficulties falling asleep, staying asleep, or getting restful sleep. This can contribute to fatigue, irritability, and difficulties in daily functioning.
4. Changes in Appetite: Some people may experience changes in appetite when overwhelmed, leading to overeating or undereating. These changes can impact overall nutrition and health.
5. Increased Heart Rate: Feeling overwhelmed can trigger the body's "fight or flight" response, leading to an increased heart rate. This physiological response is the body's way of preparing to deal with stress but can be uncomfortable and contribute to feelings of anxiety.
6. Impact on Mental Health: Unmanaged overwhelm can also have significant impacts on mental health, leading to increased feelings of anxiety, depression, irritability, or mood swings. It can also contribute to difficulty focusing, making decisions, or coping with daily stressors.
7. Physical Symptoms of Anxiety: In addition to the above symptoms, unmanaged overwhelm can also lead to physical symptoms commonly associated with anxiety, such as sweating, trembling, shortness of breath, or dizziness.
8. Impact on Relationships: The effects of emotional overwhelm are not limited to the individual experiencing them; they can also impact relationships with others. Irritability, mood swings, and difficulties in communication can strain relationships and lead to misunderstandings.
9. Impaired Cognitive Functioning: Feeling anxious and overwhelmed can impair cognitive functioning, leading to difficulties in concentration, memory problems, and reduced productivity. These cognitive impacts can further contribute to feelings of stress and overwhelm.
10. Increased Risk of Burnout: Prolonged periods of unmanaged overwhelm can increase the risk of burnout, characterized by emotional exhaustion, cynicism, and reduced effectiveness. Burnout can have serious impacts on both mental and physical health.
What Disorders Are Associated With Emotional Dysregulation?
Emotional dysregulation commonly presents as a symptom of many psychiatric disorders, including anxiety disorders, ADHD, autism spectrum disorders, bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder (BPD), post-traumatic stress disorder, substance use and eating disorders, and major depressive disorder.
Emotional Regulation Tools for Managing Anxiety and Overwhelm
Despite the challenges of emotional dysregulation, there is hope for treatment and healing. Through a combination of therapy, medication, and lifestyle changes, individuals can learn to manage their emotions more effectively and improve their overall well-being.
With the right support and commitment to treatment, individuals can find relief from emotional dysregulation and regain control over their lives, leading to a brighter and more fulfilling future.
Common treatment strategies for emotional dysregulation used by our clinicians:
Mindfulness Strategies & Coping Skills: Many presentations of emotional dysregulation as psychiatric disorders represent ineffective coping methods (i.e. turning to substances or food as in substance and eating disorders, engaging in self-harm as in BPD, or developing an “emotional numbness” commonly seen in patients with PTSD, etc.). Effective coping for emotional overwhelm thus involves assessment and reappraisal of which emotional regulation tools will be more adaptive for the present moment. Your clinician can teach you deep breathing, body scans, or other mindfulness exercises to ground yourself in the present moment, reduce anxiety, and replace ineffective means of coping.
DBT Skills: Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) has shown particular promise, even surpassing the gold-standard cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), in helping individuals with emotional dysregulation develop skills to cope with intense emotions and improve their relationships. At La Lune Integrative Psychiatry, some clinicians can teach you DBT skills, such as distress tolerance and emotion regulation, to manage intense emotions and reduce feelings of overwhelm. These skills can help you identify your emotions, understand why you're feeling a certain way, and learn healthy ways to cope.
Holistic Approaches: Exercise can help release endorphins, which are natural mood lifters, while a balanced diet can provide essential nutrients that support brain health and emotional well-being. Your clinician can help you incorporate healthy lifestyle habits like exercise, nutrition, and adequate sleep to support your overall well-being and increase your ability to cope with anxiety and overwhelm.
Pharmacotherapy: Medications used to treat emotional dysregulation, particularly in the context of co-occurring psychiatric conditions may be an essential part of a comprehensive treatment plan.
Find Inner Calm with La Lune Integrative Psychiatry
Managing feelings of anxiety and overwhelm requires a holistic approach that includes emotional regulation tools, mindfulness strategies, DBT skills, and healthy lifestyle habits. You may benefit from the guidance of professionals, such as those at La Lune Integrative Psychiatry, to learn to manage your emotions effectively, improve relationships, and ultimately reduce overall stress.
Begin your journey to wellness today with an online evaluation with one of our expert mental health providers. Appointments are available in Arizona, Colorado, Oregon & Washington.
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